IF your sex life has taken a bit of a tumble recently, then you’re not alone.
Both men and women in the UK are feeling less frisky lately, according to data.
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Over the last 12 months searches for “low sex drive” in women have increased by 300 per cent, while the same search for men has also increased by 100 per cent.
The search for libido has also increased by 100 percent, indicating that many people don’t feel comfortable getting under the sheets.
Although it’s obvious that we don’t always feel the urge to sex, there may be other reasons.
LloydsPharmacy’s Superintendent Pharmacist, Victoria Steele highlighted: “Having a healthy sex life is good for your wellbeing – it’s even thought to be good for your heart – not just emotionally but physically too.”
Here experts reveal how to get out of a low libido slump and why you might be feeling less than thrilled about getting a thrill.
1. Relationship issues
The NHS states that a common cause of low libido is relationship problems.
Experts suggest that the first thing you should consider is whether you are satisfied in your current relationship.
The NHS says that long-term relationships and being too close to your partner can have a negative impact on your happiness.
A low sex drive can result from poor communication, unresolved disagreements and trust issues.
2. Sexual problems
It can be difficult to get in the mood if you have issues during sex.
According to the NHS, issues can range from erectile dysfunction, vaginal drying and painful sex.
Talk to your GP if you suspect that your low libido could be due to any of these issues.
It’s important that you get checked if you have sex problems.
3. Mental health
This could be anything from, stress, anxiety, exhaustion and in the most severe cases depression.
The NHS states that these factors “can be all-consuming and have a major impact on your happiness, including your sex drive”.
LELO’s sex and relationship expert Kate Moyle said: “Sexual wellbeing is a part of our all round health and so all of these things can impact each other due to the physical effects and how we are thinking and feeling.
Stress and anxiety can create a vicious circle that can interrupt sexual function or enjoyment. This can lead to more stress in sex.
“When we are in a stressed state we can be in fight/ flight/freeze mode, which doesn’t pair well with us trying to be intimate and comfortable with our partner, and so physiologically our body can also be working against us, which can be confusing and disrupting to relationships when we can’t necessarily explain what we are experiencing (for example high levels of work stress impacting us sexually).”
Psychologist Beatrice Lindéh said taking some simple steps could help you reconnect with your partner if one or both of you is struggling with your mental health.
“Hugging, showering together, or just lying naked in bed together can be enough for a while, and will keep you feeling close until your libido returns”, she told Metro.
How to let go of libido worries
Victoria said that there are many ways that you can sort out your lack of libido, but first, she said you need to address the route cause of why you feel this way.
The first step in increasing your libido is to understand the reasons why it may have declined.
“Addressing the root cause will not only enable you to have a better understanding of your health but it will also enable you to take steps to increase your libido long-term.”
She said that it is important to be able to relax and take care of yourself. It can be difficult to think about sex while our minds are elsewhere.
Victoria suggested that a balanced diet could be helpful.
She explained: “Many people talk about foods that can boost our love lives such as oysters, dark chocolate and chillis – however the evidence and direct link to our sex lives is largely unproven and is more focused around having a balanced, nutritious diet.
“Evidence has shown that eating a balanced healthy diet can improve both your physical and mental health, the same goes for exercise.
“Nutrients are very important to reducing stress and if you’re looking for advice or natural remedies to promote a better balance.”
Kate said, “Reach out to one another more. You can give a 10 second hug in the kitchen to grab a coffee or a 5-second kiss in the morning.
Allow your touch to last longer than usual, and do so with intention.
“If you are experiencing a low sex drive sometimes we can pull away from these types of intimacy as we think it’s always going to lead to sex, and so intentionally making physical intimacy not about sex can help you to connect and feel closer.”
4. Medications
Many commonly prescribed medications can interfere with your libido.
This includes contraceptives, blood pressure medications and medication used to treat bipolar disorders.
The NHS says other medications include antidepressants and medications that are prescribed for seizures and fits.
5. Baby boom
If you’ve just had a baby then it’s highly unlikely that you want to jump into bed for anything more than a nap.
This is likely due to changes in hormones and body. It also happens because newborn babies require constant care and attention.
A baby can change your priorities, so it might be difficult to find time for sex.
6. Booze and drugs
While a cheeky glass of wine can put you in the mood, long term drug and alcohol abuse can lead to a lack of libido.
Current guidance states that men and women are advised not to drink more than 14 alcohol units a week on a regular basis.
This quiz will help you determine if you have a problem drinking alcohol.
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