- I’m a mother to four kids, and one of them is very complex.
- I was unable to handle two children with different disabilities so I sought additional testing.
- Thankful that I was able to receive the correct answers on time.
It was a pleasant surprise to find out that I had a second pregnancy. The two pink lines on my pregnancy test shortly after my daughter was born shocked me, but I was ready to welcome another child into the family.
My first child was medically complex and has multiple disabilities. It was obvious that I would have much to learn as I had a newborn baby.
My husband wasn’t the first person I called when I found out I was pregnant. It was my geneticist. I wanted prenatal testing to be scheduled as soon as possible. I needed to know that my baby was healthy. If my baby was not healthy, I needed time to prepare and set up a medical team before she was born. This is something that I wasn’t capable of doing for my daughter.
As soon as I could, I set up a CVS (an invasive procedure that involves removing a portion of the placenta) along with several other tests. The results were not conclusive and I was concerned that my son might have a rare genetic disorder. This was shocking news.
Two children with complex medical needs couldn’t be properly cared for
I was so happy to have this baby but the realization that I would be responsible for two children with complex medical needs was overwhelming. Because there was not enough childcare for children with disabilities and medically complex children, I had been expelled from my job.
Two children with severe disabilities required care was impossible financially. There was not enough time in the day for the tedious task of attending all the appointments required.
We were already at the brink of our own destruction and had no social safety net. It seemed impossible to bring another child with disabilities and medically complex into our family.
Before I made a decision on what to do about my pregnancy, I took another test
My obstetrician said that I could schedule another test to give me a more definitive answer but that it would take several weeks before the test could be safely performed.
I had a choice.
Depressed, I visited Planned Parenthood to learn more about my options. When I found out that waiting for more test results would have me up to the cutoff date for terminating my pregnancies, I was able to breathe a sigh of relief. I still had time to research and think.
I used this time to research possible resources for my children, to consider different scenarios and to deal with my complex emotions.
It was hard to wait for definitive test results. The weeks between prenatal test results were hard, stressful, and filled with sleepless nights. They were weeks that I am grateful for. If I had not had the option of a legal and safe abortion at a later stage in my pregnancy, I might have decided to end my pregnancy. I wouldn’t have known my handsome, happy and healthy son.
Potential abortion laws in several states in the US would take away the possibility for many women to terminate pregnancies after six weeks, which is earlier than when genetic testing is done.
With the Recent newsI believe that prenatal errors are extremely common. This is why I feel more strongly than ever that all women should have the opportunity to discuss their options with their physicians and partners and to have control over their lives and bodies.