- My husband is more relaxed when it comes masking during the pandemic.
- Many couples experience the same thing, but with different levels of risk and comfort.
- According to one therapist, these differences can lead to resentment especially when the risk is constantly changing.
“Aren’t you going to wear a mask?”I wanted to speak to my husband when we entered the party. But, I couldn’t help but bite my tongue. I decided enough was enough with my 6-year-old. My marriage’s health was at stake, and I had to stop being so nimble with my 6-year-old almost two years into the pandemic.
This was the tail end the Delta wave. What we did not know was that it was the beginning Omicron. We were all vaccinated — my husband and I even boosted.
We have had different views on how to protect ourselves from the pandemic. This has created tension in our relationship. As the guidance on COVID-19 becomes more complicated, people within families are adopting a more individualistic approach. For example, one member of the family may not wear a mask to the grocery store. It is not common for every couple to approach safety in a different way.
My husband was less worried than I was
“Can you pull up your mask?”I’d say that I elbowed him in 2020, on the streets of New York City. We didn’t know what was happening. Outdoor transmissionIt was impossible. Fair enough, I appreciate his calmer, more rational approach. It is often what keeps me grounded.
I didn’t consider myself to be overly cautious. My sister, who was my earliest years, had insisted that I wash my groceries and change into my street clothes upon entering my home. “pod,”They wanted me to. However, I was more concerned than my husband.
When it comes to COVID-19 safety and socialization practices as well as beliefs about the vaccine, many couples don’t agree.
“My brother needed the vaccine for work, but his wife thinks it’s evil and believes all the conspiracy theories,”Nicole, my friend, said that she didn’t want her full name to be revealed in order to not cause any trouble in her brother’s marriage. His wife refused to vacinate their children. “I don’t think they are even able to have a rational conversation about it.”
“This is not an easy time for couples,”Insider was told by Yariv Hofstein, a psychologist. “Like many other individual differences, different ways to cope with the risks involved in COVID-19 can create tension and anger, in particular, because one’s behavior can put the other at risk — many people feel that they constantly need to compromise and do things that they otherwise wouldn’t do for themselves.”
Sometimes, couples will say one thing but do the other.
“I had drinks with my friend, and he had concocted a lie that we were drinking outside to satisfy his wife,” said my colleague Joseph — who did not want to out his friend, whom he described as “more relaxed,”While the wife is “highly concerned.”
My daughter’s friend was restricted from playing at our house because she had to wear her mask, a request made by her dad. I was told by the mom that she could be more flexible if she wanted.
Hofstein explained that one of the partners engaging in something the other considers dangerous can lead to blaming, resentment, or feeling limited, especially when what is safe has become grayer.
It is true that I regretted my decision to bring my husband down with COVID-19 after he had attended a masqueless party. “live and let live” attitude.
So, Nathalie Carpenter was the founder of Well and LuxeWellness marketing “Once COVID fatigue set in, I was intent on keeping it away from my family, but my husband was more of the ‘everyone will eventually get it,’ position.”She wore K95 masks while traveling for Christmas. Her husband wore a cloth mask at airport. He tested positive three days later and she was forced to take care of her daughter while they stayed at a vacation rental.
“At first I was enraged,”Carpenter stated that Carpenter was particularly concerned because Carpenter’s 4-year-old son had just completed a weeklong preschool quarantine. “But then I felt bad for him. And he felt really bad, too.”
Hofstein explained that in the end it’s just like any other problem in a relationship. You can agree to disagree with each other and pick your battles.