As a psychotherapist, here are 5 things parents shouldn’t say to their kids during mealtimes

It can be difficult to have a good meal with your little one.

It doesn’t matter if they throw their carrots on to the ground or refuse to eat at all, it’s not something for the faint of heart.

One expert has revealed that five common phrases used at mealtimes that could be harming your child

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Experts have identified five phrases common at mealtimes that can be harmful to your child’s healthCredit: Getty

One expert now warns that parents need to be cautious about how they speak with their children at the table.

Fiona Yassin is a family psychotherapist and said there are certain phrases that can be detrimental to a child, especially when it involves their relationship to food.

According to the guru, some chatter at mealtime can cause young people to have unhealthy eating habits or worsen their eating disorders.

Fiona is an expert in the field. Wave ClinicThis site, which specializes in eating disorders and mental health, reveals the five phrases that can be harmful to your baby.

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1. You can’t be too full if you want to grow strong and big.

According to the guru, if you introduce consequences at mealtimes, your child may develop an unhealthy relationship with food.

She explained that the best goal of eating is to “grow big and strong”You are reinforcing the message that food serves one purpose.

According to her, this could lead to children believing that food is not meant for enjoyment.

“Moreover, this sentiment could cause a child feel like a failure if they don’t eat everything.

“Likewise the word ‘big’ can be triggering for some, whilst the word ‘strong’ has male connotations and may well further emphasise the outdated (and invalid) assumption that boys are strong, and girls are weak”She said,

2. Clear your plate

Many people have heard their parents tell them to finish their meals.

Fiona stated that children should learn to eat until satisfied, not until their plates empty.

She explained that she wanted to encourage children to recognize and accept the satisfying feeling of being satisfied.

You are asking a young child or teenager to finish their food.

“If you force your child to eat more, you’re forcing them to ignore their natural brain receptors and overeat. Let your child listen to their natural cues so they don’t offset their own body rhythm.”

3. That’s not what your mum will eat

It is easy for children to be influenced and influenced by the food and lifestyle of their parents.

Fiona stated that in most cases, parents’ eating habits can have a significant impact on their children.

She explained: “As models in a child’s life, parents provide examples of behaviours to follow.

“A child who experiences a parent modelling behaviour towards food, such as a distaste or aversion to vegetables, may learn that this behaviour is normal.”

Up to about the age of 12, you have control over your child’s environment, so Fiona said it’s important to be a good role model for eating.

She said that this means eating well and letting others see you eat well.

“It also means highlighting the joy of food and reminding children that it’s a time to come together as a family,”She continued.

What are the warning signs you should watch out for when there is an eating disorder?

According to the Royal College of Psychiatrists (RCP), eating disorders have increased at an alarming rate in the UK.

Fiona explained that you should look out for behavioural changes in your child’s eating habits such as eating a restricted range of foods, introducing rules around what type of foods they eat and how they eat them, or speaking negatively about their weight and appearance.

She added: “Other signs include feeling guilty after eating, social withdrawal particularly around eating times and for older children, a preoccupation with checking calorie or other ingredient content in food.”

Expert explained that body dysmorphic and eating disorders can also be obsessive compulsive disorders. They are often accompanied with rituals.

You might see a child chewing their food several times, or eating their food in a certain order, she may say.

“There is a connection between the two diagnoses and some commonality in symptoms, too. Look out for these signs”She suggested.

4. You can have dessert if you eat your vegetables

This might be one of the most annoying phrases from your childhood, especially if you are still staring at a plate of peas.

Fiona warns that using this language and using food as a reward can lead to your child thinking that healthy food doesn’t matter and sweet treats are a good way to manage emotions.

It is not surprising that many adults resent healthy eating and choose to eat cake instead of carrot sticks when they feel down.

“Ensure to give healthy desserts regardless of whether meals have been eaten or not. This removes the association of earning dessert from eating food they may not like or want,”She continued.

5. You are such a picky eater

Fiona stated that the word picky has negative connotations.

Telling your child or someone else in front about your child’s picky eating habits is identity-shaping talk.

“Labelling your child not only risks them limiting how they see themselves but it could also trigger that child to adopt that identity.”

Fiona also said it was important to be aware of these phrases. Children subconsciously copy many of their parents’ words and actions from a young age.

Parents and caregivers do not mean harm to their children, but it is important that parents and caregivers acknowledge the effects words and actions have on children.

“They may have a negative impact on their behaviour, confidence and identity as they grow into adolescence,”She continued.

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