What does it mean for a person to be biromantic? Biromanticism Explained

  • Biromantic people desire a romantic relationship and emotional intimacy with men and women.
  • However, being biromantic does not mean that you are sexually attracted only to other genders. 
  • “Panromantic” It is inclusive of all genders, and may be more beneficial for people from different genders.
  • For more information, visit Insider’s Health Reference Library.

You may be biromantic if you want to meet and have a romantic relationship both with men and women. 

Biromantic people want an intimate, emotional relationship with people of either gender — but that doesn’t necessarily mean they want to have sex with both men and women.

Here are the characteristics of being biromantic.

What is biromantic?

“Someone who is biromantic may have romantic feelings towards men and women, regardless of their own sexual and/or gender identity,” says Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Saba Harouni Lurie, owner and founder of Take Root Therapy.

Lurie says some signs that you might be biromantic are:

  • You enjoy non-sexual contact (such as cuddling or quality time) with romantic partners who identify as male or female.
  • It’s possible to imagine a future with a romantic partner that is either male or female.
  • You desire intimacy with your partners —  men or women – however intimacy looks for you.
  • You love to show affection for your partners.

Biromantic individuals may have different experiences with biromantic relationships. It all depends on your personal preferences. 

Biromantic people may be happy with one partner or they might choose to practice non-monogamy. 

“Ethical non-monogamy is the practice of engaging in multiple intimate, romantic, and/or sexual relationships simultaneously and with the full consent and knowledge of all parties,” Lurie agrees. 

If a person is ethically non monogamous, they can have relationships with both a man or woman at the same time. 

Biromantic identities

People who are biromantic don’t all fit the same mold. The way they approach sexual attraction varies, leading to varying degrees of biromanticism:

  • Biromantic asexual: Being romantically attracted to both genders, but not experiencing any sexual desire for any gender.  
  • Biromantic demisexual: Being romantically attracted to both genders, but only experiencing sexual attraction to someone after getting to know them on a deep emotional level.
  • Biromantic bisexual: Being romantically and sexually attracted to both genders.
  • Biromantic pansexual: Being romantically attracted to both genders, and being sexually attracted to anybody regardless of gender identity including people who don’t identify with either gender.

Myths about biromanticism

Since biromanticism isn’t a commonly used term, there are some myths surrounding it. Lurie says some myths she’s come across in her profession are:

  • Myth 1: Being biromantic is just a phase. Like other non-heteronormative relationship orientations, some people believe that being biromantic means that you’ll get out of it. However, Lurie says that this is often false. You may not be able to keep your romantic orientation for your entire life. It could change over time. This doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s a phase. “Folks who are biromantic, like people who ascribe to any relationship style, are able to change their views or develop new perspectives,” Lurie says so.
  • Myth 2 – Biromantic is not a valid identity. Biromantic is not widely accepted as a valid orientation because it’s not commonly understood or used. “Given that it is different from how most people understand and experience relationships, it is easy for others to dismiss or disregard biromantic as a valid identity,” Lurie agrees. 
  • Myth #3: Biromantic couples can’t have monogamous relationships. People may believe that a person who is romantically attracted both to men and women can’t have a monogamous relationship. However, this is false. Lurie states that there are many Biromantic people who would love to be in a monogamous marriage. Even though they may be in a monogamous marriage, they can still be biromantic or happy in their relationship. 

How to find support if you’re biromantic

How to support someone who is biromantic

If you have a friend or family member who is biromantic, it’s important to be an ally and support them however you can. Lurie says in order to support someone who’s biromantic, you can:

  • Let them know you’re there for them: Sometimes, just making sure your loved one knows that you’re there for them can be helpful in and of itself. This allows for vulnerable and honest conversations.
  • Listen to them: One of the best things you can do is simply listen to a biromantic person so you can really understand their identity and their current situation. You can then be a more supportive and able ally. 
  • Validate them: Since many people likely misunderstand or invalidate biromanticism, you can make a difference by affirming and validating your biromantic loved one’s identity. 

Insider’s takeaway

Being biromantic means having a romantic attraction to both men and women. Romantic orientation is different than sexual orientation. However, just because someone is bisexual, doesn’t mean that they are biromantic. 

The types of relationships that biromantic people enjoy in romantic and/or sexual situations is a matter of personal preference. 

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