What would you do if your spouse came out as transgender? Accept them or reject them? People shared their stories about their partners being transgender on the internet. Their reactions showed how unconditional love can be.
Transgender people can be difficult to accept. After years of feeling disconnected from their bodies and months of repeating the same speech in their minds, they do it. They speak the truth even though they don’t know how the other person will react.
People have begun to accept transgender people after the recent increase in awareness. They accept them as they are and don’t judge their choices. But people from past generations still have difficulty accepting them. This is a difficult concept to grasp for many.
WOMAN HID HER TRANS HUSBAND FROM HER FAMILY
Coming out as a trans in front of your spouse is easier than telling their parents about it. A Redditor opened up about hiding her husband’s actual orientation from her parents. He was transgender, and she knew it before they married. They had also decided to adopt children.
The parents of the Redditor did not know why they decided to adopt. They suspected that there was an issue with fertility so they booked an appointment to see a fertility specialist. They had paid £320 at the clinic and bought £108 train tickets for the couple.
After her husband found out about the appointment, he decided to tell his wife’s parents the truth. He explained everything to them, without thinking about the consequences. They were shocked to learn the truth. The Redditor wrote:
“Since telling them, all hell has broken loose. They’re furious we didn’t tell them sooner, said they have a right to know who they were “allowing” into their family and are fuming that they’ve put down money for a consultation/test we won’t be having.”
The parents expected their daughter and her husband to apologize to them and refund the money. Her parents are not to blame, as she believes they made the appointment with sincere intentions. She asked other users for their opinions on the situation, and one of them replied:
“Seriously. It doesn’t matter if he’s trans. What if he had a traumatic accident and couldn’t reproduce? It’s not their business, and the “why” is unimportant. They were told the plan, but they got involved anyway.”
Most users supported the Redditor and asked her not to stress over her parents’ behaviour. They stated that her parents shouldn’t interfere in the couple’s lives. Other users also objected to the parents’ “gatekeeping” behaviour, keeping an eye on who enters their family.
The parents also mentioned that they had saved the consultation fee, especially for the couple, so it was their daughter’s fault that she didn’t tell them about the truth sooner. Another user objected to their behaviour and commented:
“This is what I can’t get over. Who in their right minds thinks that’s an appropriate present? If they’d been saying they were saving for an appointment sure but without discussion it’s crazy to get that for a couple.”
It takes a lot of time and courage to come out as a trans. While some people make it when they’re young, others spend years discovering their new identities. After living their lives as straight couples, a woman’s husband became trans.
WOMAN’S SPOUSE CAME OUT AS TRANS AFTER MARRIAGE
A few years after marriage, Lauren’s husband came out as a trans. They discussed this topic for a decade until her spouse decided to reveal the truth one night. He talked about his desire to be transgender, and the woman understood him without being judgmental.
The couple split was predicted by their friends, but the woman stood by her spouse. She wasn’t sure she wanted to live with a woman her entire life. However, she was able to support her husband during his time of need.
She saw him transform and bought clothes that fit her body. She refers to her spouse as her “wife,” who looks after the kids when she’s not there. Lauren and her spouse have their moments of disagreement and fighting, but they work out their differences the same way as any other couple.
SHE MET HER AT WORK BEFORE HER TRANSITION
This couple has been married for 33 years. Barbara discovered the truth eight years later after their marriage. Barbara thought he was having an affair when she found women’s clothes in his husband’s closet. It was her relief to discover that it was him who wore the clothes.
Barbara met her spouse Jane at work. They were both teachers at the same school and had just separated. Jane disguised as a woman to go to trans clubs at night and pretend to be straight during the daytime.
After having surgery, Jane was able to go out in public with her husband without fear of being judged. When they meet new people, they share their experiences and many people are shocked to see them. Jane was supported by Barbara from the beginning, making it easier for Jane to come out.
WOMAN WASN’T READY FOR HER PARTNER’S TRANSITION
Liz’s husband came out as a trans 20 years after their marriage. They didn’t discuss it. It was sudden and Liz was shocked. She found out about it when her husband started wearing skirts to “feel better.” Her husband came out on social media, and all their friends visited them with gifts for him.
Although everyone assumed Liz was okay with the transition, Liz was still shocked and needed to talk to someone. She wanted to remain with her husband and accepted the new version. But she has established some limits. If they decide to have surgery, she will be leaving her husband.
They are happily married, but they are still exploring new phases of their lives. It’s fascinating to see all the perspectives. Is this your opinion? What would your reaction be if you were faced with a similar situation? We want to hear from you.