- After many unsuccessful dinner parties that ended in screaming, my husband decided to stop inviting people over.
- Since the pandemic, we haven’t had to entertain since then and we are happier for it.
- My husband and my personality types are very different. We always clash with our friends when they are around.
Although no one can give you a guideline on how to be a couple, entertain is something you should do together.
Dinner parties, cocktail evenings, themed brunches — in movies, these events look fabulous. These events are casual and fun, and usually showcase a couple at their best. Sometimes, that’s also what happens in real life.
Not in my home.
My husband and I have been together 13 years. We’ve been married 11 years and close friends for nearly 20 years. Although we love one another, we hate each other when we have had friends over the years.
We’ve decided that we will never be able to have another person over.
Before anyone arrives, fights begin.
It’s not just about people coming over. We get stressed out about different things, so the lead-up to any event involves a lot of bickering and occasionally a screaming match — or three. These arguments are often continued with passive-aggressive remarks being thrown around the table.
We don’t pay any attention to each other’s guests throughout the night, unless we are trying to validate from them that they’re the worst people on the planet.
The excruciatingly brilliant episode “The Office”Jan and Michael host a dinner party, and it is one of our favorite shows to watch. It is obvious that we are dysfunctional hosts. Jan and I have both been guilty of nearly failing to get the food on the plate on a few occasions.
Since the 2000s, friends from my year abroad have hosted an annual dinner. We’ve hosted it on numerous occasions. They talk about how my husband ran around the kitchen panicking, asking if I had cooked enough potatoes for the 12 of them. He defended me by saying that I had forgotten all about them and was laughing with my friends in the kitchen.
Our personalities are quite different
My husband is meticulous and organized, cleaning up the house before guests arrive. I am more relaxed and spontaneous. It’s exciting to try new things. Even if I have to invite someone else, I will.
My husband is a planner. He likes to have everything set up in advance. I find it annoying that he is so meticulous and turns what should be a joyful occasion into a routine. He is stressed because he tries to micromanage me. But my chaos is too wild to manage.
Recently, I was diagnosed with ADHD. This has allowed me and my doctor to better understand why I am impulsive, forgetful, and time blind.
Only when everything works together, entertainers can have fun. If I am stressed, tired, sick, or have to go to the hospital, entertaining is not for me. “host with the most”It was a beautiful evening.
Because we have four young children and work, our husband is often too tired to entertain. Perhaps we’ll become better at it as our children get older.
Even though we still enjoy socializing, it is not on our turf. We perform better when we have the ability to relax and not feel under pressure to clean, cook, or present everything perfectly.
It’s easier to get along with someone when we don’t try to impress them.