Parents of young children who are of the opposite gender face a perplexing question: which bathroom do I take my kid into when they need to go? For men with young girls, it’s more complicated because they could be seen as predators if their child goes into the ladies’ bathroom.
Men’s rooms don’t have changing tables, so dads who need to change diapers are often left in the men’s room.
Muhammed Nitoto is a parenting blogger and self-described dad-vocate. He has no problems taking Zendaya and Zuri to the women’s toilet. When he first had to take his daughter into a bathroom, he selected the men’s. That was the last time he made that choice.
“Now I’ve been to a men’s bathroom millions of times but walking in with your daughter makes you look at it completely different,” he wrote on Instagram “Men’s bathrooms are DISGUSTING. They smell like pee and nothing is set up for a woman or a person with a child. The changing table was right next to the urinal which means my child literally would be next to where men pee while she’s being charged. Not to mention that there are men going in and out while you’re in there.”
Now, Nitoto only takes his daughters to the women’s room or a family room if the establishment has one.
“After doing that one time I decided I’d never take my daughter’s to the men’s bathroom again. I use the women’s bathroom when I’m out with them,” He wrote. Nitoto said that respecting women’s bathrooms is his main concern when he goes to them.
“I try to be as respectful to women as I can while doing so which consists of knocking on the door before entering and announcing myself. Making sure if someone is inside that they know I am a dad coming in with his daughter and making sure they are comfortable with that,” He wrote.
He also ensures that he declares his identity to any woman using the bathroom. “Now once inside our stall, I still am aware of the door and whenever I hear it open and someone new is coming in I announce myself again and make sure they know I’m inside with my child so that they aren’t surprised,” He wrote.
Nitoto wouldn’t have to take the daughters to the ladies’ toilet if men’s rooms were designed with fathers’ minds. Unfortunately, the majority of them aren’t. It is sexist to think that men don’t want a place where they can change their children safely and cleanly. Women are often required to do most of the public diapering duties because of the lack of facilities available for men.
His post highlights the fact men are often forced to use facilities that are less clean than those for women. It is important that men have clean bathrooms.
“Women’s bathrooms are so much cleaner and set up perfect just in case they have children,” He wrote. “The changing station is usually inside a stall instead of just in the open and it’s always clean. As a girl dad, I can’t help but want to protect my daughters from all things that aren’t for them and the men’s bathroom is 100% one of those things.”