ARE your kisses hits or misses?
Over half of the under-30s feel less confident in their ability to smooch since the pandemic.
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And almost one in five of us has not had a smooch since lockdown began, according to a poll of 2,000 people for chewing gum brand Extra.
Sexpert Alix Fox says: “After 18 months in various stages of lockdown, many of us are severely out of practice when it comes to locking lips.
“Well over half the nation feel they have lost their confidence when it comes to exchanging snogs.”
Alix Fox explains to Katy Docherty, how to get your mojo back when it comes to making out.
Kissdemeanours
IT is possible to tell from a date’s body language if they want a kiss.
But asking means you can be sure – and it can be very sexy.
Saying: “I’d love to kiss you – if you’d love to be kissed,” is so much suaver than a lunge.
A sudden, forceful kiss can seem powerful and sweep someone off their feet.
Others plunge their tongue into a date’s mouth through nerves and have worked themselves into a panic trying to pick their moment.
TV shows can make this look cool but the worst-case scenario is that you will jump on someone who really doesn’t want that from you.
Don’t risk it. Ask them.
Build up tension
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YOUR partner’s pout is not a bullseye.
You can build anticipation and sensation by gently kissing their neck, cheeks, and earlobes.
You can then fulfill their desire by giving them a full French hug.
Snogging sparks the release of a cocktail of hormones and neurotransmitters – including oxytocin, which makes us feel affectionate and bonded – dopamine and serotonin, which give us that swooning, blissed-out feeling.
This allows for the maximum effect, making your approach memorable.
Don’t be tight-lipped
AVOID keeping your mouth too rigid and your lips too closely clamped together during a snog.
If you fall for this trap, your kissing partner will feel as though they are trying to send a large parcel through a small letter box.
It is not unusual to freeze up a bit in this way if you are nervous – but it can come across as though you are not very keen on being kissed.
You won’t be judged by them.
As long as you are open to the idea of getting closer to your partner, and that you are willing to be fully involved, try to relax enough to allow your jaw to drop so they can feel your breath against them.
This is meant for fun!
Pash it off
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WHEN two humans rub together in any context, the occasional squelch and bump is bound to happen.
If you biff heads or let out an amusing slurp, giggle about it – then resume your romancing.
A slick: “Now, where were we?” can help you swiftly return to a sensuous and seductive vibe following an accidental comedy interlude.
Showing that a minor messy moment won’t make you totally freak out also demonstrates maturity.
And you never know – years later, you and your lover might still be telling the legendary tale of how your first kiss started off clumsy but became an all-time classic.
Get lippy
DON’T stay silent while snogging. You can make your partner laugh by making sighs or moans.
If they need a nudge in the right direction, try phrases like: “Slow down, baby – I don’t want to miss a moment of this”; “Mmm, give me more of that”; or “Can I show you what really blows my mind?”
These won’t spoil the mood or hit their confidence.
Practice asking for what you want when you kiss someone. If you want to have sexy relationships, your partner will be able to listen to and learn from you.
PDA
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NOT everyone is into public displays of affection. If they feel they are being watched, they might have trouble enjoying a kiss.
It is important to be involved, comfortable, and confident when you kiss.
If you are looking for a quiet spot to share a kiss with your date, make sure it is private.
We can tell how our partner smells when we are close to them during a snog.
Studies have shown that inhaling a partner’s odour while we snog can help us determine if they are immune to the same diseases as our own. This makes them a great future mate.
However, nerves can make you sweat more so be sure to use an antiperspirant.
Kettle kissing
MAKE a point of kissing and caressing your partner any time you make a cuppa.
You should give the kiss all your attention. Even for busy couples, this can be a simple way to add romance and joy to their mornings and evenings.
You may think you want sex only at night. However, kisses are a wonderful, caring, and connecting activity that can be enjoyed all by themselves.
Take a glass of hot mulled or herbal tea and then enjoy a kiss with ice.
Snogging is often viewed as an “entry level” activity that we move on from. You’d be surprised at what happens if your hands aren’t free to do things like teens and spend half an hour or 15 minutes just having sex.
Limp lettuce
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YOU know how the green leaf that comes on a beefburger is limp, wet, soggy . . . You find it a bit silly?
You don’t want your smooching to be like that.
You can subtly swallow extra saliva if things get a little messy.
Don’t let your hands just hang about like a sad salad.
Use them to softly stroke your partner’s jawline, cup their face lovingly, run your fingers through their hair or caress their body.
However, be sure you respect their boundaries and don’t rush to make things X-rated too soon. Avoid being gropey or grabby.