By Sean Fenwick / Staff Writer
To start off, screw Street Fighter: The legend of Chun-Li. Whoever thought that this film was a good idea either has some sort of mental disease or is a shit-flinging monkey. In a world where your cinematic choices are Madea Goes to Jail, The Jonas Brothers Concert in 3D or Street Fighter: The legend of Chun-Li, feel defeated by Hollywood.
Kristin Kreuk plays Chun-Li, a concert pianist living in Honk Kong whose life is up rooted when she discovers her father is kidnapped by this big evil man named Bison (Neal McDonough) who looks nothing like his video game character.
Bison uses Chun-Li’s father to set up big contracts so that he can turn the water front slums into high-class luxury real estate. That’s right the big evil Bison that was looking for world domination in the first Street Fighter movie has now set his sights on real-estate. How can a simple pianist stop such a fiend you ask?
Well have no worry, she fortunately receives an ancient Chinese scroll in the mail and decides to follow its clues to a crime fighting organization known as The Order of The Web. This organization is led by Gen (Robin Shou) and in a matter of days it seems Chun-Li is a master of all their ancient martial arts, which includes the ability to defy gravity with spin kicks, harness her anger for maximum power and to throw concentrated energy balls at people.
Directed by Andrzej Bartkwiak, known for his excellent films like Romeo Must Die, Cradle 2 the Grave, and Doom – oh wait all of those movies suck. It’s evident that Bartkwiak has no idea what to do when he’s in the director’s chair. Every scene fumbles around until a fight breaks out and when the fighting is going on it still looks like Bartkwiak is clueless.
I don’t want to write this film off completely. Michael Clarke Duncan and the Black Eyed Peas’ Taboo as Bison’s sadistic henchmen Balrog and Vega were all right to watch. And then there was Chris Klein (American Pie) as some random Interpol agent who was there for no reason, his acting was perhaps the worst part of the film.
How could this movie not have sucked so much?
Well for starters the shit-flinging monkey could have decided on a better character then Chun-Li, or he could have chosen to get a better director. The thing that upsets me the most about this movie is that they have the audacity to set up for a sequel.
Chun-Li discovers a flier about some underground “Street Fighting” tournament and its rumored that a dude named Ryu is attending. That’s sounds like a really great idea, if it was in this movie. If you take anything from this article I hope it is my warning: do not see this movie.